Gottman Method Couple & Marriage Counselling
Get your relationship or marriage back on track now.
Having a close connected relationship with understanding and support is something that most people want. Challenges to a relationship can occur at any stage of a relationship and most couples will face issues and challenges at some point in their relationship. I am trained and certified as a Gottman Method Couples Therapist and it is backed by over 4 decades of research and it is also backed by studies that show it is an effective approach to address and improve a wide range of relationship issues.
What tools you will learn
Improving Intimacy and Emotional Connection
Improving closeness and intimacy through appreciation, fondness, admiration, romance, and building a culture of respect. Couples that do these report that they have good relationships and that they feel respected, admired and loved.
Conflict Management
All the aspects of conflict management will be addressed so that you are able to discuss difficult issues in a productive fashion. Plus you will be able to avoid being in "disaster mode" by learning a variety of strategies to manage the most common barriers to effective conflict management.
Understanding Your Partner's Needs
Knowing your partner's needs and what they require to feel loved, safe, protected and respected are essential. Most couples who come to see me reveal that they do not know this very well or in the detail that their partner desires.
Accepting differences
All couples are different in some unique and basic ways. It is essential that we find a way to accept the unique differences in our partner. This is vital because at a basic or fundamental level we want to feel that our partner accepts us for who we are.
Supporting Each Other's Life Dreams
Couples who honour and support each other's dreams have a nearly unbreakable relationship. Crushing your partner's dreams will inevitably lead to divorce.
Listening and Communication
Listening is an art and many of us believe that we are good listeners. In my experience it is a skill set that needs improvement for most couples who are experiencing conflict and emotional diesngement. Learning basic skills in listening and avoiding the common pitfalls is extremely beneficial.
Gottman Method Couples Therapy
Common Issues
There is nothing wrong with you if you are having problems in your relationship, it's normal. However, if the problems in your relationship are persistent and/or affecting your quality of life, I would recommend that you seek counselling or couples therapy from a Certified Gottman Method Couples Therapist. Some of the more common problems that can be addressed in Gottman Couples Therapy include:
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Communication difficulties – not feeling understood or known by your partner and avoiding issues
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Sexual dissatisfaction and lack of romance, passion and intimacy
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Power struggles – one or both partners do not compromises or accept influence
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Emotional disconnection, emotional disengagement and emotional distance
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Betrayal and trust issues – Affairs (either sexual, porn, or emotional) and also addictions
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Conflict and constant fighting with little or no resolution, progress or repair and not feeling understood
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The same conflict issues coming up daily, weekly, monthly and yearly
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Outside Influences – Work, In laws, or Family
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Grief and Loss
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Feeling unsupported. lonely and misunderstood
What can you expect in Gottman Method Couples Therapy?
When you come to couples counselling or couples therapy you can expect to be able to share your relationship difficulties in a respectful, caring and non-judgemental environment. It can be a daunting thing to come to your first session but everyone reports to me that after the first session they feel more relaxed and comfortable in the following sessions.
You and your partner will have the opportunity to discuss your issues in a safe environment and in this setting; you are both able to gain deeper levels of insight into your relationship dynamics as well as to allow mutual understanding within the relationship. I will provide a safe place for you both to learn and improve your communication with support and coaching in the skills and strategies that research has shown to be effective.
I am empathetic to both partners and I also avoid taking sides. Positive changes can be seen after about 4-6 sessions, but this will vary from couple to couple depending on the nature and complexities in the relationship. The length of the therapy is also dependent on you and your partner; the range is 8 to 20 sessions. The approach I use, is based on the work of Drs. John and Julie Gottman and their colleagues, and it is supported by over 45 years of extensive research about what makes relationships work and how to make lasting changes to improve your relationship. I am a Certified Gottman Therapist.
For more information about the Gottman method please follow this link: The Gottman Method
The Gottman Method Couples Therapy involves a detailed assessment and goal setting in preparation for the therapy session.
I deliver Gottman Couples Therapy in 3 ways - the 2-day Marathon, Mini Marathon (4hours) or 2 hours weekly session which I will explain below:
1. Marathon Therapy: 4 hours assessment & 2 days 8.30am – 4.30pm therapy (weekend appointments available for extra fee)
Marathon Therapy is a dynamic alternative to weekly sessions as it is a condensed and focused approach to relationship counselling that will provide you with the time you need to address specific issues and get your relationship back on track QUICKLY.
2. Mini Marathon Therapy: 4 hours assessment + 4 hours x 4 therapy. The 4 hours therapy can be weekly or twince weekly.
3. Weekly : 4 hours assessment + 2 hours x 6 therapy. The 2 hours therapy can be weekly.
More sessions will be added once therapy has started as necessary and depending on your situation and current challenges.
Once therapy goals have been achieved then the maintenance sessions are then scheduled at regular intervals to ensure that you are staying on track with the changes that you have developed during the therapy stage. Initially it is monthly then it is extended out to every 6 months until the 2-year mark is reached.
The Assessment Sessions
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Before your initial session, each of you separately fill in a the Gottman Relationship Checkup questionnaire online which gives me a lot of information that I can’t easily gather otherwise and the results are forwarded to me.
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In the first session we are going to discuss the current issues and the your history of your relationship.
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And then I will see both of you for one session individually: which helps me to get to know you and understand how you see the world because that’s going to be important for me.
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The next session, I want to help you understand what makes a great relationship. We are going to look at how your relationship is functioning at the moment in comparison to a road map we have from research about what it takes to have a great relationship. After we do that we are going to set your goals and how we are going to approach therapy.
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It's best to complete the assessment as fast as possible so that we can commence the Therapy. Preferably within a week not longer than 2 weeks.
The Therapy Sessions
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The therapy starts after the assessment sessions.
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Therapy is about you both learning a new way of conflict management and communicating in ways that build frinedship, closeness, greater understanding, deeper connection, intimacy and greater shared meaning. I will regularly check with your goals and ensure that we are making the progress that you need.
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Research shows that frequency and intensity in treatment generally results in real change and faster change.
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When you make an appointment we will book a series of sessions for the entire couples therapy. In addition to the four assessment sessions, bookings will be made for several therapy sessions.
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Deciding between the marathon, mini marathon or 2 hours per week for the therapy depends upon the intensity that is required and the complexity of the challenges that we are addressing as well as your availability and budget. The treatment/therapy sessions are weekly or twice weekly. As progress is made then they are spaced out to fortnightly or longer. I am available for full day or half day treatment sessions for couples that want to make fast progress or are coming from out of town.
Summary
Marathon/Mini Marathon :
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4 hours assessment followed by 2 days therapy / 4 hours x 4 therapy, followed by 2 hour therapy sessions as needed
Weekly :
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4 hours assessment followed by 2 hour therapy sessions for 6 weeks or more, followed by 2 hour therapy sessions scheduled as needed.
My fee is $210 per hour.
Couples Therapy is not eligible to receive any Medicare Rebates. If you have Private Health Insurance, please check with your insurer regarding rebates. The item number for couples therapy is 300.
You can check my appointment availability Click Here.
For new clients, please contact me on 0419 738 231 for organizing 15 minutes free consultaion.
Improve your life today. Call 0419 738 231.
What if my partner refuses to come with me?
I recommend that if possible, both you and your partner come to therapy. However, if one party does not wish to come for therapy, I still recommend that you come for individual counselling for your relationship difficulties.
There is the chance that over time, your partner will notice the positive changes in yourself and this might encourage him/her to come to sessions with you in the future. If anything, working on yourself within the context of your relationship is going to have a positive effect on your relationship, as well as your own personal well-being.
Don’t delay any further – research shows that improving your relationship is possible. Having relationship difficulties can be a real source of stress and affect your quality of life. I understand how tough it can be trying to handle these issues alone.
It’s good to talk.
I have been a leading provider of professional counselling services for individuals, couples organisations and groups on the Gold Coast for over 30 years. I am fully qualified and registered with the Psychology Board of Australia. I am a Certified Gottman Therapist and I apply that method in couples counselling. Rest assured that you are in the care of very experienced and profession psychologist.
Booking an appointment is easy.
Appointments are available Monday to Thursday from 10am to 7:30pm, on Friday from 8:30am to 12:30pm, and on Saturday from 8am to 10am. I am registered to offer Medicare and private health insurance rebates. For further information on fees click here.
You can improve your life.
Make the phone call today to book a counselling appointment to improve your life and move towards the life you know that you deserve. Call David now on 0419 738 231.